Online Safety Tips
Hello and congratulations for becoming a member of eflame.com.au
Internet dating is a lot of fun and a terrific way to meet people. The great majority of those online are sincere about meeting others for offline friendships, dating, and possibly marriage.
As with all dating (online and off), you must be careful with those you meet.
Eflame.com.au has gathered a few tips from Internet dating experts to help you have a safe and fulfilling experience. These suggestions are not meant to frighten you, only to help prepare you and keep you safe. A little caution and common sense goes a long way.
Below are a few Internet dating safety tips brought to you by Eflame.com.au to get you started.
1. Use common sense and exercise caution.
2. Protect your anonymity. Always use an anonymous nickname. Never include your last name, real email address, personal Web site URL, home address, phone number, place of work, or any other identifying information in your profile or initial e-mails you exchange with other members. Also ensure your email signature file is turned off, or does not include identifying information. Should someone pressure you for this type of information, stop communicating with them immediately and contact the administrators at eflame so that we might investigate. You should always be very comfortable with the person before revealing any personal contact information. Be sure to ask lots and lots of questions. Make sure you are happy with the answers. We can not stress this enough -- trust your instincts and move slowly and cautiously.
3. At first, communicate only via smiles and the eflame Online e-mail service. Make sure you are using an anonymous e-mail address like those provided to you at eflame.com.au. Avoid using an e-mail with your real name in it. You can sign up for a Yahoo or hotmail account for free.
4. Don't rush into things. Do not become intimate with anyone (online or off) before you get to know the person very well. You are a member of Eflame.com.au to find someone to build a lasting and trusting relationship with. Sometimes when someone appears to be 'too good too be true', most often they are - Play it smart and avoid these people.
5. Always be on the lookout for odd or unusual behavior. If the person makes you uncomfortable in ANY way at all, don't ignore the feeling. Leave immediately. Always trust your own instincts. Do not worry about 'What will they think?' or 'I don't want to embarrass myself.' Your well being should be your only concern.
6. Listen to, and if possible, write facts down that the person tells you. This will allow you to look for inconsistencies. Pay special attention to their age, appearance, marital status, if they have children, occupation, employment status, and interests / hobbies.
7. Ask for a photo. This will not only allow you to see the person's appearance, it can also give you a gut feeling about who he or she is - good or bad. If possible, it's best to view several photos of the person in different setting to help you get a better idea of their personality. If they don't want to give you one, move on. Lots of people will. Take advantage of our Block Member facilities to block any member you wish to cease contacting you. If they are harrasing you contact us at Eflame and we will terminate their account.
8. If you feel good about the person and are ready to move to the next level, talk via the telephone. You can learn a lot from a person's communication and social skill when you're on the phone. For the first few conversations, don't call from your home phone - you want to keep your home and work phone numbers anonymous. Try phoning from a pay phone. Only when you are completely comfortable, should you make a call from home and disclose your home number.
If you set up times to call each other, try to call at an unscheduled time. If this person really is your friend or soul mate, they will be happy to hear from you at any time. If they are not, then they may be trying to hide something. Perhaps a wife or husband, boyfriend or girlfriend? At any rate, they are not worth your time. Also listen for any background voices. Is there anyone of the opposite sex? If so, maybe inquire innocently as to whom you hear. Do you hear children? Did they mention they had kids? If not, it might be time to reconsider.
9. Only meet when, and if YOU are READY. One of the benefits of online dating, is that you can get to know someone from the safety of your home. Then when you fully trust the person, you can meet in face to face. Do not be pressured into meeting someone - you may decide you only want an online relationship. This is always acceptable. If they truly cared about you, they would not pressure you. And remember, even if you did decide to meet the person, you have the right to change your mind at any time.
10. Watch for warning signs such as:
Outbursts of anger or frustration.
Attempts to pressure you into something or to control you.
If they refuse to speak to you on the phone, then they may have something to hide.
Will they only give you a work phone number?
Do they avoid questions, difficult or otherwise?
When you meet them in person, do they appear significantly different then they described themselves?
Do they avoid introducing you to family and friends?
11. If meeting offline, ensure you let someone know when, where, and who you are meeting. Also let them know when you will be returning home. Be sure you give a friend your date's home phone number. Bring a mobilel phone with you, and ask someone to call you during your date to ensure everything is running smoothly. When your date is over, call your friend or family member and let them know you are back from your date.
12. Select a safe environment to meet in person.
Do not go to their house or invite them to yours.
Do not arrange for your date to pick you up or drive you home. Provide your own transportation - don't walk in case they follow you.
Meet in a familiar public place at a time when you're sure there will be lots of people around. A familiar coffee shop or restaurant is a great choice. If you know a place where you know some of the employees, it would be excellent - please ensure they are working at the time of your date.
Do not go anywhere secluded.
Avoid hikes, walks, bike rides, and overnight excursions.
If during your date, you both decide to move to a different location, take your own car. Do not go in the same vehicle or bus with your date. If you're uncomfortable about moving to another location, say your goodbyes early. You are not committed to going with them.
13. Use extra caution if not meeting in an area your familiar with. If you are flying in for your date, arrange for your own hotel room and car. Do not give the name of your hotel to your date. Under no circumstances allow your date to make your hotel or car arrangements. Drive or taxi to your predetermined meeting place. If it looks secluded, unsafe or inappropriate, turn around, and head back to your hotel. Call your date from a payphone in the hotel and arrange a different location. If the location gave you the creeps, then cancel your date altogether, and head home! Always ensure a friend or family member has your contact information and knows when and where you are meeting your date. Carry a mobile phone with you at all times. When your date is over, call your friend or family member and let them know you are back from your date.
14. Uncomfortable, and want to end your date in a hurry? If you feel unsure or are getting a bad feeling, leave right away. If your date scares you in any way, don't second guess yourself - get out. Excuse yourself, and either leave out the back door and drive home, or call a friend or family member to pick you. Don't wait for your friend outside - stay in view of other patrons. If you are really scared, call the police or talk to the manager of the establishment you are in. Explain the situation and ask if you can stay with them. Don't be embarrassed or worry about your behavior. Your safety is all that matters. Not the opinion of someone you don't trust.
15. Never give out your personal financial information. If they ask you for money, they are not the right person for you. Move on.
15. Never give out your personal financial information. If they ask
you for money, they are not the right person for you. Move on.
17. Occasionally, criminals will attempt to use websites like ours to
solicit people for scams. If, for example, you ever receive a message
asking for help getting large sums of money out of an African/Russian or any other country,
offering to sell a product, or with any other commercial purpose, do not
respond to the message. Instead, please send a copy of the message you
received to us at Eflame. We will report
any illegal activity to the appropriate authorities, and
delete the account of the perpetrator to help protect the safety of all
our members.
The Internet is a convenient way for making new friends and
meeting a possible mate that is perfect for you. Just like anywhere else,
there are potential risks of which you should be aware. But if you use
common sense and are cautious, your experience can be safe and
rewarding. So enjoy your on-line dating experience. We truly hope you find that special person at www.eflame.com.au |
